June 21, 2ôô8
NAVIGATING THE FRINGE STREAM
- LISTING A BIT TO THE LEFT...
Summer Solstice, sometimes known as Midsummer, Litha, or St. John's Day, occurs in the middle of June. It is a celebration of the longest day of the year and the beginning of Summer.
Celebrate Solstice time with other Pagans - Keep a Sacred Fire burning throughout the gathering. Stay up all night on Solstice Eve and welcome the rising Sun at dawn. Have a magical gift exchange with friends. Do ecstatic dancing to drums around a blazing bonfire.
Da Rev & Da Pagan Baby let Baconhenge be the site of our seasonal celebration! Yes - we let bacon stand in for the sacrificed Year King, French toast for the Grain Goddess, the eggs in the frittata for the Cosmic Egg, and the vegetables for the bountiful Earth on which we live.
BLOGGING FOR OBAMA
"Politics has gotten so expensive - it takes a lot of money just to get beat!"
Michelle Obama can, for the first time in her adult life, be proud of her cookie recipe.
I READ IT @ WONKETTE.COM - SO I KNOW IT’S TRUE!
Next week Hillary Clinton will be campaigning with Barack Obama, which means only one thing: the former candidate and the current candidate are totally in cahoots and having phone sex all the time to discuss how they can break the hearts of millions of acolytes of The Obamessiah across the nation by making Clinton Obama’s running “mate.”
BOB AND BARACK
Bob Dylan says he supports Barack Obama. Well, we think that's what Bob said. Or maybe he said he saw a barber cut a lama's hair - while riding on a golden cloud tied to a butterfly with a lisp - as a striped man wearing a felt hat stroked a mint flavored cat. Tom's Lake Humor Co.
McCain-Lieberman Ticket Could Be Saltiest, Crustiest Combo Since Kettle Chips
Comedian Argus Hamilton passed this along:
Cindy McCain's cookie recipe in Family Circle was apparently stolen from Hershey's. She was also nabbed for stealing recipes off the Food Network. If most trophy wives can just stick a toothpick into an olive they've done their cooking for the day.
Comedian Argus Hamilton says: The White House asked Congress for two billion for Iowa floods. It's the worst disaster since Katrina. There have been so many plagues during the Bush presidency that by the end of his term he will have his own book in the Old Testament.
President Bush told England he rejects the idea that only white-guy Methodists are capable of self-government. It's an article of faith with him. He deeply believes that all people are capable of self-government once a white-guy Methodist topples their dictator for them.
Gov. Bobby Jindal Welcomes Darwin-Debunker
Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal, the Indian street urchin who is also somehow a Mexican Catholic exorcist, is 36-years-old and supposedly “beloved” by his backward state, for being charismatic and STRONG. Wonkette
The Louisiana law, SB 733, the LA Science Education Act, has national implications. So far, this legislation has failed in every other state where it was proposed, except in Michigan, where it remains in committee. By passing SB 733, Louisiana has set a dangerous precedent that will benefit the Discovery Institute by helping them to advance their strategy to get intelligent design creationism into public schools. Louisiana is only the beginning. Other states will now be encouraged to pass such legislation, and the Discovery Institute has already said that they will continue their push to get such legislation passed.
Gov. Jindal's support for teaching ID clearly helped to get this bill passed in the first place! Simply allowing the bill to become law without his signature, which is one of the governor's options, does not absolve him of the responsibility for protecting the public school science classes of Louisiana. He must veto the bill to show that he is serious about improving Louisiana by improving education. Anything less than a veto means that the governor is giving a green light to creationists to undermine the education of Louisiana children.
The Discovery Institute does not intend to stop with the Pelican State.
If Gov. Bobby Jindal has any national political aspirations (such as Sen. McSame's running mate), this willful destruction of science education in his home state is going to follow him around like stink on a skunk!
"No Name On The Bullet"
Audie Leon Murphy would be 84. The son of poor Texas sharecroppers, Audie rose to national fame as the most decorated U.S. combat soldier of World War II. Among his 33 awards and decorations was the Medal of Honor, the highest military award for bravery that can be given to any individual in the United States of America, for "conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at the risk of his life above and beyond the call of duty." He also received every decoration for valor that his country had to offer, some of them more than once, including 5 decorations by France and Belgium. Credited with either killing over 240 of the enemy while wounding and capturing many others, he became a legend within the 3rd Infantry Division. Beginning his service as an Army Private, Audie quickly rose to the enlisted rank of Staff Sergeant, was given a "battle field" commission as 2nd Lieutenant, was wounded three times, fought in 9 major campaigns across the European Theater, and survived the war…
His first starring role came in a 1949 released film by Allied Artists called, Bad Boy. In 1950 Murphy eventually got a contract with Universal-International (later called Universal) where he starred in 26 films, 23 of them westerns over the next 15 years. His 1949 autobiography To Hell And Back was a best seller. Murphy starred as himself in a film biography released by Universal-International in 1955 with the same title. The movie, To Hell and Back, held the record as Universal's highest grossing picture until 1975 when it was finally surpassed by the movie Jaws. In the mid-60s the studios switched from contract players to hiring actors on a picture-by-picture basis. Consequently, when his contract expired in 1965 Universal did not renew. This gave him the opportunity to work with other studios and independent film producers. In the 25 years that Audie spent in Hollywood, he made a total of 44 feature films.
Audie Murphy wrote some poetry and was quite successful as a songwriter. His two biggest hits were Shutters and Boards and When the Wind Blows in Chicago.
FREEDOM FLIES IN YOUR HEART LIKE AN EAGLE
Dusty old helmet, rusty old gun,
They sit in the corner and wait -
Two souvenirs of the Second World War
That have withstood the time, and the hate.
Mute witness to a time of much trouble.
Where kill or be killed was the law -
Were these implements used with high honor?
What was the glory they saw?
Many times I've wanted to ask them -
And now that we're here all alone,
Relics all three of a long ago war -
Where has freedom gone?
Freedom flies in your heart like an eagle.
Let it soar with the winds high above
Among the spirits of soldiers now sleeping,
Guard it with care and with love.
I salute my old friends in the corner,
I agree with all they have said -
And if the moment of truth comes tomorrow,
I'll be free, or By God, I'll be dead!
. . . Audie Murphy
CYD CHARISSE - (Born Tula Ellice Finklea) (87) was an American screen dance siren and actress. She was born in Amarillo, Texas, and reputedly, the name "Cyd" was a nickname taken from a sibling trying to say "Sis". Charisse had been married to singer Tony Martin since 1948, 60 years, something of an achievement for a Hollywood marriage. She was previously married to Nico Charisse from 1939 to 1947. She leaves two sons, Nico "Nicky" Charisse from her first marriage and Tony Martin Jr. from her second.
Charisse is now principally celebrated for her on-screen pairings with Fred Astaire and Gene Kelly. She first appeared with Astaire in a brief routine in Ziegfeld Follies (produced in 1944, released in 1946). Her next appearance with him was as lead female role in The Band Wagon (1953) where she danced with Astaire in the acclaimed "Dancing in the Dark" and "Girl Hunt Ballet" routines. In 1957, she rejoined Astaire in the film version of Silk Stockings, a musical remake of 1939's Ninotchka, with Charisse taking over Greta Garbo's famous role. Gene Kelly chose Charisse to partner him in the celebrated "Broadway Melody" ballet finale from Singin' in the Rain (1952), and she co-starred with Kelly in the 1954 Scottish-themed musical film Brigadoon. She again took the lead female role alongside Kelly in his penultimate MGM musical It's Always Fair Weather (1956). Wikipedia
The MGM censors were alway vigilant on the sets - scrutinizing her sexy costumes - yet they passed some of the most provocative, sensual dance movements in Hollywood musicals of the era.
"McCain is so different from Bush. The only issues they agree on are education, immigration, Iraq, abortion, Supreme Court judges, Social Security, tax breaks for the wealthy, wire-tapping, trade, health care, the Middle East, same-sex marriage and Medicare."
[Stephen Colbert, on McCain running away from Mein Fuhrer] Thanx t' BartCop.com
"I don't think I've ever been accused of seducing anyone - including my wife."
(Click on any image to ENLARGE it)
Welcome to our crib in Metro Fairborn, Ohio and THE STAND-UP! -
We are very pleased to share with you an exceptional original music composition from the band “Greedy Gonad” right after this important message:
PLEASE - join Da Rev & Da Pagan Baby in contributing to an all out effort to eradicate a horrific malady brought to our attention by Darrell‘s other brother Darrell. I hope we can count on a check from everyone here this weekend for $500. or more for continuing research into Viper's Sun Foot…
I read the headline in the Fairborn Daily Herald today and it shocked me - It read, “Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half.” I hate to see that…
Al Gore sends me e-mails with helpful information - like: “Ear wax makes dandy lip balm!”
Natural selection & survival of the fittest is the rule of life, so if we have to bump off polar bears, sea turtles & Repuglicans for us humans to survive, then so be it!
Scientists discovered a group of monkeys in Asia who know how to fish. For the average monkey, fishing is a great way to relax after a busy day of picking bugs off himself and throwing his poop.
Tom's Lake Humor Co.
It’s too bad about Hitler. Really. He never lived long enough to enjoy a long and horrible dying experience from third stage syphilis.
Most husbands know how to avoid arguments with their wives about leaving the toilet seat up. They just piss in the sink…
Garfield Without the Damn Cat
New York increased the tax on cigarettes, they now cost a record-breaking 12 dollars per pack. If you visit New York, try to control your smoker's cough. You don't want to send a signal to the muggers that you're rich.
Tom's Lake Humor Co.
Tim - you’re like a brother to me - I’m SO gonna give you a wedgie!
In the newspaper: A story about infectious diseases caused by "Mexican bathtub cheese". I am NOT making this up! Americans are getting sick from eating smuggled cheese that's made in bathtubs. (TRUE) Let me tell you: Not only would I not eat Mexican bathtub cheese -- I would not take a bath in a Mexican bathtub! Tom's Lake Humor Co.
I find cartoons on TV are more enjoyable than many programs with human actors. Question: If a Smurf marries a Simpson - do they have green babies?! Tom's Lake Humor Co.
Where was Helen of Troy from?
E: Troy, like, duh
Indeever the young Snow Leopard cub, is seen in Zuerich Zoo, after his first vaccinations on Friday, June 20, 2008. Indeever was born on April 27, 2008.
Photo by MARTIN RUETSCHI
I hesitate to bring this up - but who do you ask if you think a word in the dictionary is misspelled?
Where was Helen of Troy from?
The Lovely Helen
A Fun Quiz
See how many you know:
The Name Behind The Initial
Da Rev got 75% correct…
65 Famous People Who Went Bankrupt HERE:
What sweet irony!
As the media continues to entertain discussion of Senator Obama's promise to talk to adversarial national leaders - these headlines appeared together...
Which Senators Are America’s Hobo Kings?
With all this talk about Chris Dodd and Kent Conrad getting SWEETHEART MORTGAGE DEALS giving them literally fractions of a percentage point off their mortgage interest and fees, it’s instructive to find out how many of America’s senators even have mortgages.
A shocking number do not, which means they are either living in cardboard boxes like 99% of their bankrupted constituents, or they paid off their houses in 1957, back when John McCain was running for his first term. Find out what Politico’s intrepid researchers dug up...
Let’s see here…Barbara Boxer had TWO mortgages through Countrywide, America’s Subprime Villain, but paid them off two years ago.
Fat Cat Hillary Clinton has a loan through Citibank for her house in New York but owns her DC digs outright.
Carl Levin lives under a hill in a snuggly little cave with a perfectly round door.
Arlen Specter sleeps in a ditch.
Ohio Congressman John Boner, (R-Redneck Flats) sleeps in a tanning bed;
NC Sen. Lindsay Graham, (R-Tarheel Flats) bunks in the locker room at the YMCA;
KY Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Briar Flats) lives with his teenage house boy Hector in a giant, dark tower-like structure with a giant flaming eyeball on the peak;
Sen. John McSame lives in a bamboo cage adjacent to the National Zoo, where he entertains his guests with PTSD flashbacks and games of Russian roulette;
VT Socialist Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Same Sex Acres) has a mortgage from a credit union. Credit Unions are part of an original Soviet plot to overthrow American capitalism;
Sen. Larry Craig (R-I Da Ho) lives in a toilet stall at the airport;
MA Sen. John Kerry (D-Elite Heights) lives in a Heinz ketchup bottle with a sail on it;
Sen. Trentor Lott (R-The Confederacy) lives on a glorious plantation surrounded by his singing mulatto slavechildren...
So yeah, pretty much what you’d expect.
Here's the chart if you're trying to fight insomnia:
Scotty McClellan's Next Book: What Happened When I Did Yo Mama
Jake Novak's Humor Blog
President Bush and John McCain are ignoring environmental concerns and now support lifting most bans on offshore drilling. Most Americans support the plan since they can't afford to drive to the beach anymore anyway.
Lehman Brothers is replacing two of its top executives a day after admitting a $2.8 billion loss. The firm is now looking for replacements with prior experience in shutting off the lights and helping everyone pack up their desks.
Bounced Check Fees Rise
More U.S. banks are increasing bounced check fees. Chase Bank is now charging $34, Bank of America's new fee is $25, and, hoping to avoid bankruptcy, Lehman Brothers is charging $17 million.
Much of Iowa remains under water as flooding continues in several cities. I wonder what Hillary Clinton has in mind for the other states that voted for Barack Obama?
Honda's new hydrogen fuel cell car, the FCX Clarity is now being produced. The vehicle can get up to 500 miles per tank, but unfortunately the two hydrogen fuel filling stations in America are 600 miles apart.
Iran says its army is now at its "highest state of readiness" to respond to an Israeli attack; they've been practicing retreating all week.
Gitmo Prisoners Rights
The Supreme Court has just ruled that foreign inmates at Guantanamo Bay can hire lawyers and sue the federal government. And in a move to boost the economy, the court also ruled that the inmates have the right to buy foreclosed homes in Cleveland.
Barack Obama spent a day shadowing a nurse at a St. Louis hospital last week. It's days like this that make Bill Clinton miss the campaign most.
Come and laugh with Argus
in San Diego!
Friday and Saturday, July 11-16
8:00 and 10:30 p.m.
The Comedy Store La Jolla
for information Comedian Argus Hamilton
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid denounced President Bush's proposal to begin drilling offshore and called on the government to encourage development of renewable sources of energy. Harry - you can't run a car on wind. It's not like the Senate.
MORE from Argus!
The Boston Celtics clobbered the Los Angeles Lakers Tuesday to capture the NBA Championship. The refereeing was loose. The Celtics were assaulting Kobe Bryant under the basket and getting away with it, proving that what goes around comes around.
The Weather Channel showed scary footage of Mississippi River levees breaking in downstate Illinois. Many of the houses and towns on the river are built on bluffs. One guy financed a six-bedroom home by convincing Countrywide he had a job.
President Bush visited flooded farms and small towns of Iowa where he met with flood victims and consoled them. It was an eye-opening experience for the president. He's been in over his head for seven years and he never thought of sandbags.
President Bush toured Iowa where half the homes are flooded. The water is contaminated with fertilizer and soil additives and pesticides. Next year when corn grows out of linoleum it will be the signature achievement of the Bush administration.
Joan Rivers was kicked off a British daytime talk show in the middle of a live broadcast for using expletives to describe Russell Crowe (She called him a “f*ckin‘ sh*t”). She was happy to have the publicity. Joan Rivers is seventy-five years old but Ed McMahon has already proved that no one who worked on the Tonight Show can ever afford to stop working.
MORE from Jake!
R. Kelly was acquitted of child sex charges. But he didn't help his public image much when he was asked what he was going to do next and he said: "I'm going to Disneyland!"
RACHEL BILSON - if intelligence & beauty were a tootsie pop - I wouldn't stop licking until I got to her sweet center...
PICKUP LINES THAT HAVE NOT WORKED…
I can’t find my puppy; can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
HUNKS FOR THE LADIES
MORE Pickup Lines that didn't WORK!
That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap next to my bed.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
It strange, but you look just like my mother.
One way or another I’m going to make love to you tonight but I’d rather you be there.
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
'38 Studebaker Express Coupe
Good fortune. COMMENT! Please spread the meme. Don’t smoke in bed…