A tip of the tight-fitting, brain-cramping Deerstalker Cap to YOU, Gentle Readers!
"MAN WITH PIPE"
Yup, that photo atop the page of a red-headed stepchild in a deer stalker with a pipe is Da Rev. This is exactly the persona I am trying to project - strange...
“I want to find the secret of the universe and put it on a T-shirt ($9.99 + tax + handling).” [Rev. Art]
Yes, I am a member of the Vast Atheist Conspiracy (VAC).
"I don't believe in anything unless I can eat it, drink it, drive, fuck it or find some other way to perceive that it exists." [Rev. Art]
Did Ben Franklin say, "We’ve given you a Banana Republic. It’s up to you to keep it?" How will we protect our Western values from the rabid dog Islamist hordes when perhaps most of us would be hard put to articulate 3 or 4 Western values?
It takes an informed public to keep a Republic. How many original thinkers have you encountered lately? According to the media whores the original thinkers are all lip-synching on cable-TV. 
(Click thumbnails to view)
<<<Science and technology are distractions put in our path by Satan! That's what I, Karim Jamocha, have posted on MY website, Reverend Demon-Spawn!
BELIEF?
(So - you’re a(n) atheist, secular humanist, freethinker, "bright", et al.)? Don’t you believe in ANYTHING?)
I believe in what I know.
I believe in personal autonomy.
I believe in the essential goodness of humans.
I believe in truth. Proof. Experience. Unrequited love.
A man should believe in something - - and I believe I’ll have another beer . . .
Why do so many monotheists - Christians, Jews, Muslims, exercise so much of their time and energy trying to prove what is not only unproveable - but is false. If there are lessons for living that one derives from these scriptures, why not take it and let it go at that? What is the need to change the minds of all the others? If only everyone could/would adopt a rational approach to words written by men - then we might eliminate the cause of most wars. Then we could work on the other stuff . . .
*TAKE A WALK ON THE WILD SIDE, REV.! - doot de doot de doot de doot . . . Note to Judge Roid Moore, Chief Idiot Thumper of the State of Alababble, and Jay Sekulow and every parasitic public official, preacher or lawyer who continues to contend before every court in the land on behalf of religious displays on tax-payer-supported property: (Click thumbnail) Here's hopin' the Supremes put this big rock to bed this session. And - why does it always have to be THEIR decalogue? I mean, why not Bruce's 10 Commandments? 1. Control yourself. FROM SUNDRY SUNDAY FUNDIES Here’s a simple missive I received. Attached was a list of people I never heard of and one former co-worker’s name. He’s a Catholic convert who finds my rationalist view of how we came to be and why we are here unacceptable. I think he owes me a beer after all this . . . < It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a mess about having “In God We Trust” on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance. Why don’t we just tell the 14% to shut up and sit down???? Secularists are often wrongly accused of trying to purge religious ideals from public discourse. We simply want to deny them public sponsorship. The tone of this forwarded e-mail is anti-American. I didn't delete it. I took time to respond - and I didn't "pass this on". I welcome serious discussion from anyone who agrees to think before he or she leaps . . . An optimist finds the glass half full; a pessimist finds it half empty. Da Rev's a skeptic, who dares to question. Is the glass half empty, half full - or twice as large as it needs to be? RANT, REV - RANT! You’ve seen that brief acclamation almost everywhere, am I right? To what purpose? Are we invited to join in, add to it? I can do this: (Click thumbnail) IS MADALYN MURRAY-O'HAIR BURNING IN HELL? OR . . .
(Gravelly, almost whispery voice, Man): Lou Reed has officiated at a wedding recently, so I heard on the radio. I should do that. I have ministerial credentials from the Universal Life Church in Modesto, California, along with a license from the Ohio Secretary of State to officiate at weddings.
I’ve thought about it. I sang at a friend’s wedding once. He married a high school sweetheart with an off-putting bumpy complexion (she worked at McDonald’s).
They chose Jim Croce’s “Time In A Bottle”. I accompanied myself on my American-made 1962 Epiphone Bard model 12-string guitar. I hope you know that you have to use both hands to play a 12-banger. I’ve tried not to take it personally - but Jeff and the bride with the poor complexion stayed together only 10 months.
I doubt there are many calls for atheist or unaffiliated or none-of-the-above weddings anyway. My son got married in a civil ceremony and opted for the Mayor of a posh suburban community where none of us could ever afford to live...
Thomas Jefferson would tell you (again), "It is in our lives and not our words that our religion must be read." 
2. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
3. You fuck with the bull, you get the horn.
4. You can’t learn a damned thing from people who agree with you.
5. Sticks and stones will break your bones, but words will never hurt you.
6. Power corrupts.
7. Talk is cheap.
8. Love the one you’re with.
9. You will die.
10. Shit happens.
We’ve all gotten these kinds of forwarded e-mails for further forwarding ad nauseum. To what purpose? I dunno. I think it may trace back to primitive instincts that urge us to band together to expel outsiders and keep the tribe pure and strong. Isn’t that a fine set of kneejerk reaction to new ideas or different people in this 3rd Millennium?
If you agree, pass this on, if not delete... >
Da Rev answers: I’m sorry, but I disagree. Someone on this list has apparently mistaken me for an American Taliban. I’m a citizen of these United States and I have no basis to form a belief in a supernatural hierarchy. On the other hand, I have no interest in dispelling your faith - you’re welcome to it, and I have no interest in interfering with anyone’s free expression of their religion - as long as they do not seek
support from government coffers and as long as they do not proselytize in government venues.
By the way, this grand, brave, young Republic is not a Majoritarian state, not anything close to a pure democracy. Isn’t that a good thing? Our system of laws and representative democracy, along with the separation of branches of gummint have served to protect the minorities of most kinds from the tyranny of the majority - at least most of the time.
Separation of religion from gummint has allowed religions to flourish in this country where there are more sects with more folks adhering to them than any other civilized country in the world. Isn’t that what we purport to foster in Afghanistan and Iraq?
<<< JESUS IS LORD!!
RALPH REED IS TINY!
TYSON IS CANNIBAL!
FALWELL IS SLEAZE!
BUSHCO IS LIES!
VANILLA ICE IS FORGOTTEN!
Pi R SQUARE!
EM R SOME BIG 'UNS!
Or, as I saw on a religious discussion forum one time, from an overexuberant born-again - “JESUS IS LARD!”
Blasphemy, is it? I dunno. If it is, it’s a victimless crime, ain’t it?
I'd like to see this: Christ died for our sins, descended into Hell, and rose again on the third day, in accordance with the Scriptures . . . And all I got was this lousy T-shirt!
A few years back Madalyn Murray O'Hair came to a bad end when, according to newspaper accounts, she, her son and her adopted grand daughter were murdered, probably dismembered, probably for money. Ms. O'Hair was a thoroughly unpleasant person and the alleged killer supposedly told someone that he would just love to torture her, beginning by cutting off her toes one at a time.
Ol' Mad Maddy had a son William, who struggled against being the weird little atheist son of “the most hated woman in America” (many said) and having his name on the 1962 Supreme Court case that ruled against MANDATORY school prayer in public schools. He grew up and became a Christian preacher. He preached against atheism a lot. When his Mom, brother and niece were killed, he claimed the bodies, as such, and provided a Christian burial service, against the wishes of the deceased and over the protests of the successors to O'Hair’s American Atheists organization.
What does that buy you - a Christian burial? Hmmm . . . I wonder.
A few ideas come to mind:
Ol' Mad Maddy is dancin' in the sky with Elvis.
She’s gone over the rainbow to see Dorothy and Toto.
She’s at the decidedly left hand of Jahweh ripping the wings off angels.
She’s livin' large on the BIG ROCK CANDY MOUNTAIN! strong>
Whad'ya think? Is Madalyn Murray O'Hair the stuff of mythmaking? Send your suggestions to Da Rev - just post 'em in a COMMENT!
Be sure to document any miracles - we’ll alert the
Vatican. Hey - maybe we can push OUR gal out front of the equally disagreeable Mother Teresa!
