"ARIEL SHARON actually came up with a third way -- a policy that
consists neither of resistance to all Israeli territorial concessions and to a
Palestinian state nor of concessions made in negotiations with the Palestinians.
Sharon's way is to withdraw without Palestinian involvement from territory
deemed too difficult or costly to defend, thereby creating a de facto
Palestinian state with borders of Israel's choosing, and to build a fence
between the two states." [Attorney Paul Mirengoff at conservative syndicate Power
Line]P.O.E.T.S.!
PISS ON EVER'THIN'
- T'DAY'S SUNDAY, January 8, 2ôô6!
(Click on any image to ENLARGE IT!)
Da Rev's stand-up begins after the quotes & "Unsubscribed"...
UNSUBSCRIBED: Lou Rawls Dead at 72 Lou grew up on the South Side of Chicago and began singing in the church choir. He always swore they started him in the baritone section at age 8!
This link from [CNN International] seemed confusing at first - then I realized that, you know, they're reporting from different time zones and all...
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WELL HOWDY, REV'LERS!
Someone told me, "You certainly live in your own little
world!"
I said, "But I'm well-known there!"
I'm having a tax-deductible experience! I need an energy crunch!!
Does everybody have enough beef jerky?
Is this going to involve RAW human ecstasy?
Somewhere in Tenafly, New
Jersey, a chiropractor is viewing ``Leave it to Beaver'' - starring Little Ralph
Reed, a close personal friend of Jack Abramoffukkah.
CHEESES - that reminds me
- HUGH BEAUMONT (who played Ward Cleaver on "Leave it to Beaver") died in 1982!! Now I am depressed...
BUT WAIT! My brother will be celebrating his 58th birthday Tuesday in Clearwater, Florida where life is a PATIO OF FUN - by whipping up a batch of illegal psilocybin chop suey!!
Don't you just hate it that there are some lunatics - whose lunacy is only discernible after you've married them?
Don't you just hate being one of the two birds being killed with one stone?
John, I know you just hate it when I say this - but if aliens abducted you and returned you to earth radically enlightened, no one would believe you, and whatever you could contribute to the sum of mankind's knowledge would be completely ignored.
OKAY! OKAY! I'm going to GO OUT and BURN some RUBBER!!THIS JUST ________ IN ! !
PAT ROBERTSON IMAGINES GOD AS A PETTY CLOWNISH THUG! WONKETTE Wow. We haven't heard this sort of irrational backlash over a stroke since
Fabrizio Moretti got engaged to Drew Barrymore. Deviating wildly from the
Christian ethos that nearly universally posits that God is the wisest entity to
ever create human free will out of a botched botanical experiment, Pat Robertson
said yesterday that Ariel Sharon had his stroke because God was cheesed off at
the way he was partitioning "His land."
Robertson's statement earned him his fair share of rebuke, from the White
House on down, but Robertson never seems to really have to pay a price for the
invidious emanations of his wafer-hole... it's a real shame we can't Do anything to cancel Robertson's endless readings
from The Book of Dick. 
PINCH HITTING FOR ARIEL SHARON By Tom Mott
SHARON IS FINE!!
By Dr. Jackie Henson At The Hospital (LaughFish.com) - Despite reports to the contrary, LaughFish has learned that Sharon is in great shape. Dr. Joshua Klein issued a statement confirming this report. “I have personally treated the patient several times over the past several years and I can tell you that Sharon is looking better than ever. Exercise and eating right will keep you fit.
Sharon is a perfect example of that.”
Click here to view:
GOD WARRIOR I & II
From: The Gay Black Jew I’m also organizing a boycott of Hardee’s. A Hardee’s near the mine accident posted signs asking for people to pray for the miners. I’m offended by this. I don’t pray, and I don’t want to be asked to pray. And besides, people shouldn’t waste their time talking to themselves. It’s creepy and unproductive. But most importantly, Hardee’s violated the principle of Separation of Church and Steak.
Ms. Cox.
WONKETTE'S
SEX CHANGE?!
The most important moment of the week:
After a few days of dawdling, you learned that your beloved Ana Marie Cox would be elevating to Editor Emeritus. Wonkette is dead - long live Wonkette.
Long live
Wonkette: "The time freed up from posting 12 times a day will be largely devoted to
weeping over a diminishing Google Alert ego feed and working on my new
book, which is non-fiction and therefore will require leaving the house. That
will be a new experience but I'll leave a trail of breadcrumbs. And I'll try to
remember to wear pants."
Comedian Argus Hamilton contributes these assessments of the past week's events:
Bolivia on Tuesday inaugurated as its new
president coca farmer Evo Morales, who's vowed to legalize coca production for
medicinal purposes. Its medical use is well-known. Los Angeles plastic surgeons
use the drug to solicit new clients on the dance floor.
Democratic
Congressmen Jack Murtha advised young Americans not to enlist in the military
due to Iraq. They just had to raise the maximum recruiting age to forty-two.
Iraq might not be another Vietnam, but at the rate they are going it might be a
Vietnam reunion.
The Gay Black Jew
Washington D.C.'s former mayor
Marion Berry was robbed at gunpoint Monday in his apartment. He said he paid
kids to carry in his groceries, then they robbed him. Jack Abramoffukkah wasn't
kidding when he told the judge that he mentored inner city youth. 
Jack Abramoffukkah pleaded guilty to conspiracy and
wire fraud in Miami on Wednesday. He made a similar plea in Washington on
Tuesday. Karl Rove called him Thursday and offered him a cushy job in the prison
library if he would cop to outing Valerie Plame. 
HERE'S SOMETHIN' REALLY, REALLY IMPORTANT!
The
USC Trojans played the Texas Longhorns for the national title this week in the
Rose Bowl. Both team mascots are controversial. Vegetarians object to a mascot
which represents the beef industry, and the Catholic church objects to birth
control. 
The Crowne Plaza
Hotel in Orlando last weekend found itself hosting Catholic schoolchildren
playing in a soccer tournament and an adult swingers convention. The two sports
are exact opposites. Soccer is the lowest scoring game in the world.
The Rose Bowl between USC and Texas
commanded ten thousand dollars a ticket Wednesday. It was worth it. Good seats
were available for five thousand bucks but they didn't include the photograph of
you with Jack Abramoff and Tom DeLay.
Wedding
Crashers, about two pals who crash weddings to seduce the bridesmaids, came out
on video Tuesday. The debate has really shifted. Republicans damned this movie
in July for being immoral but they're hailing it today for being heterosexual.
Bathhouse Row in Hot Springs was threatened by wildfires
burning in Arkansas Wednesday. Firefighters battled to save the historic
buildings. The Arkansas state film commission is hoping that Bathhouse Row will
be the set for the sequel to Brokeback Mountain.
WARNING! PG-34! 
PLEASE EXPLAIN "CLUSTERFUCK"!?! by Betty Lee Mason -
When I was in college at Berkeley in the 50s, my sorority sisters and I used to go to gangbangs all the time. Fraternities and sororities would get together for organized, social gangbangs. We'd meet each other and then we'd gangbang. That was what we did back then. Lots of gangbangs.
But today, I keep hearing the word clusterfuck. What is a clusterfuck? It
sounds like a gangbang while playing a game of Twister. It sounds painful. With
young people today, everything has to be more extreme than whatever their
parents did.
JULIA LOUIS-DREYFUSS - "Elaine" on Seinfeld...
ACTRESS MINNIE DRIVER - She's SOOOOoooo HOT! !
PROTECT OUR TROOPS - FROM THE WOMB TO THE TOMB WAR! Miss Poppy's Store What if the fetus you were going to abort
would grow up to be a soldier bringing democracy to a godless dictatorship?
Plastic replica of an 11-12 week old fetus, 3" long, holding a firearm in its
precious little hand, with an assortment of other military paraphernalia,
encased in a translucent plastic ornament, with a patriotic yellow ribbon on
top. Includes a metal ornament hanger. If only a womb were this safe, attractive
and reasonably priced!
Show that you support the "culture of life" by buying and proudly displaying one of these patriotic unborn Americans.
Also available in a "Brown" model
Who doesn't LOVE Barbie?
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Good fortune. COMMENT!! Please spread the meme. Don't smoke in bed...
