"BACK IN THE DAY"...
I was a candidate for a Darwin Award when I was 3! No shit!
At age 3, I had the curiosity of a future physicist, and confidence born of
never having suffered painful consequences from leaping, literally, to a
conclusion. (Maybe I was primarily utilizing the right hemisphere of my brain.)
At any rate, I figured that if my tricycle were going as fast as possible, I’d
be able to leap a chasm (and this was before TV or Evel Knievel or SUPER DAVE). I pedaled as
fast as I could on the downhill sidewalk in the back of my grandma’s house in
Wilmington, Ohio, straight for the chasm . . .
Hmmm, perhaps my mistake was to
discount the fact that the chasm was a set of 3 steps leading to the house from
the sidewalk . . . and the other side of said chasm was a 90-degree right turn
to the rough surface of a stone retaining wall which was nearly level with the
sidewalk.
Duh Bumpity Bump Bump . . . I toppled over like that little guy in
the yellow rain suit on the old Laugh-In Show. I busted my clavicle. Nobody mentioned anything about Darwin. After all - this was in Wilmington, Ohio – in 1945!
In MY day . . .
In MY day, we didn’t
have hand-held calculators. We had to do addition on our fingers. To
subtract, we had to have some fingers amputated.
In MY day, we didn’t have PC health-food restaurants. We ate plenty of easily recognizable animal parts and lots of potatoes drenched in melted fat from those animals. And we’re all strong as AARGGKK - GAKKK! . . . thud.
In MY day, "60 Minutes" wasn’t
a bunch of gray-haired, liberal 80-year-old guys.
It was a bunch of gray-haired, liberal 60-year-old guys.
In MY day, we didn’t have water. We had to smash together our own hydrogen and oxygen atoms.
In MY day, we didn’t have
Strom Thurmond in Washington. Wait, yes, we did.
Good fortune. COMMENT! Please spread the meme. Don't smoke in bed...
