Some other “they” is always
quick to point out that it’s a “jobless recovery”. How do "they"
know the number of Americans unemployed? With all the illegal workers that they
don’t know about, I don’t have a lot of confidence in the gummint’s figures on
the unemployed.
I’m unemployed, but I don’t get
counted. I worked for a small non-profit organization that didn’t participate
in the unemployment insurance fund. So I don’t count. I’m a no-count
blog-slinger. No gummint surveyor has walked up to me when I was not working and questioned me.
But I think they should:
“Excuse me - I'm Agent Stiffy - Department of Labor Statistics: What are you
doing?”
“Do I have to tell you?”
"No, but when the Patriot Act is fully implemented, you may be pulled in for a less friendly interrogation."
“I just stopped to smell the flowers.”
“Smelling flowers? So you’re not employed.”
“Nope, I’m otherwise engaged. I never had an opportunity to stop and smell the flowers until one day the world of work bus pulled up and the door opened. 'They' said, 'This is your stop, Bud.' ”
“I’ll mark you down as unemployed, not looking for work.”
“Whoa!
You’re 'marking me down'? It’s 3 o'clock on Thursday afternoon.
I’ve been making calls, sending resumes, taking interviews, sharpening
my skills and networking since Monday morning at 8
AM until, well - about 15 minutes ago!”
“It doesn't really matter. If you’re not on the dole, we have no record of you. I have no other category in which to squeeze you and make you fit, Sir. It’s not personal.”
“OK, hurry up and mark me down. I gotta get back to networking. We’re standing right across from my network.”
“Your network? But that’s a saloon.”
“NOW I’d say your survey's gettin' personal...
"Good for you, Sir..."
"It was last Friday. The manager leaned across
the desk and said, “I ask all prospective employees the same two questions,
Reverend:
'Are you filled with the spirit of volunteerism? And do you like magic?'"
"What did you tell him?"
"I said, 'Uhhhh ....' "
(Click on image to ENLARGE it)
