October 6, 2ôô7
x 3,808....3,809
BLOGGING FOR HILLARY
"A new ABC News/ Washington Post poll shows Hillary leading Obama 53-20%.
A new Quinnipiac Univ. poll of NY RVs shows HRC leading Obama 47-15%.
In a general matchup, HRC leads Giuliani 52-41%."
[Wake-up-Call!] 
JOIN TEAM HILLARY TODAY!
YEAH, BUT...! Da Rev supports Hillary for President. However - “Hillary Care” falls waaaayyy short of what we should expect from a candidate who’s been studying’ American healthcare for at least 15 years.
Start paying attention, AMERICA! How would HR 676, Congressman John Conyers’ single payer plan, provide greater benefits to every person in this country and save money at the same time? By eliminating the insurance company profits, marketing costs, CEO salaries, and the cost of paying thousands of unnecessary employees to deny our claims - the way they increase their profits.
One/third of the healthcare billions we now pay into profits and advertising and administration would instead be available for covering healthcare for everybody.
Read MORE about Hillary’s CORPORATE healthcare plan plus SINGLE PAYER. SINGLE PAYER. SINGLE PAYER. SINGLE PAYER!
CARL STORY INDUCTED INTO BLUEGRASS HALL OF FAME
Click for: International Bluegrass Music Association award winners
Lorraine Bracco (52 or 53) is an Academy Award, Golden Globe, Razzie, and Emmy Award nominated and Screen Actors Guild winning American actress best known for her roles as Karen Hill in Goodfellas and Dr. Jennifer Melfi on the hit HBO TV series, The Sopranos.
The MSNBC host of Hardball has a hot new book:
Purchase this book on AMAZON & Help Support Rev. Art’s Blog
“Ramblin’ Ray” Garrison, (61) host of the WYSO-FM (www.WYSO.org) old-time country music program "Midnight Ramble," died Thursday, Oct. 5, 2007 after a battle with cancer. Garrison had been volunteering at the public radio station since 1981.
Da Rev met Ramblin’ Ray and sat in with him on one of his shows. He never lost his original New York accent, nor his love for traditional country and Western Swing music from the ‘40s-’50s. His knowledge of the genre and his extensive collection of recordings more than made up for his sometimes awkward on-air presentation.
A few weeks ago Ray had come in for one last show. His voice was high and weak. He huffed and puffed and gave other audible evidence that he was struggling through severe pain and weakness. It was not pleasant to be listening and not be able to help him out. Ray always signed off with: “I’m headin’ for the car, ‘cause these shoes are killin’ me…” After 26 years, Damn, I’m gonna miss that little guy on Saturday nights!
George Grizzard (79) versatile actor who achieved his greatest renown on the stage, playing everything from Shakespeare to Shaw, from Neil Simon to Edward Albee. Grizzard's career began in the '50s and lasted more than 50 years. He had roles in movies and was a familiar face on TV. But it was in the theater that he thrived, particularly in Albee's plays. He appeared in the original 1962 Broadway production of Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, Albee's seething drama of marital strife. On TV, Grizzard made regular guest appearances on series like Law & Order. He died of lung cancer in New York City on October 2, 2007. Life In Legacy
"On the issue of evolution, the verdict is still out on how God created the world."
[George W. Bush]
They were allowed to stay there on one condition, and that is that they didn't eat of the tree of knowledge. That has been the condition of the Christian church from then until now." [Clarence Darrow]
“God help us if we had Cheney during the Cuban missile crisis. We’d all be under a parking lot.” [Hardball‘s Chris Mathews]
"There is nothing more dangerous than an oppressed people who acquire the first weapons of education and organisation." [Bernadette Devlin McAliskey - Republican Activist, Ireland]
"I will continue my search for the real queers - something that is not possible if I leave. And if anyone doesn't like it they can line up and blow me."
[Senator Larry Craig, R-Idaho]
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WELL HOWDY, REV’LERS! 
I’m Rev. Art. Welcome to our crib in Metro Fairborn and THE STAND-UP! - Its like Sesame Street without the subtle homoerotic innuendos… you know - "without the Bert & Ernie butt sex."
PLEASE - join Da Rev & Da Pagan Baby in contributing to an all out effort to eradicate a horrific malady brought to our attention by Cesaire and Yvonne. I hope we can count on a check from everyone here this weekend for $500. or more for continuing research into “Elephant‘s Diary Upset with Festering Intestines”!
Oh, Man! This is a tough Stand-UP! Late last night - OJ Simpson burst
into our house and stole all my jokes! Thanx t' Tom's Lake Humor Co.
Hey, did you read about this - an Australian bloke became the first person to remain conscious and talk during brain surgery. He didn't say a lot. He just mumbled something about "needing this like I need another hole in the head".
In a situation such as that, it’s probably prudent to avoid subjects such as politics or religion with someone holding a scalpel to your brain... Thanx t' Tom's Lake Humor Co.
In Germany a scientist claims he's come up with a faster and easier way to clone animals. He's very excited about his new cloning method. The report says he's beside himself! Thanx t' Tom's Lake Humor Co.
Religion isn't the opiate of the masses. Opium is. 
You choose to abstain from sex? Fine. I choose to abstain from Jesus.
Remember when they were warning us to limit our fish intake? Now they say we should eat more fish. “Pregnant women should have 3 servings of fish per week,” they say. I still wonder if reports of the benefits of eating fish aren’t… well, fishtitious!
Have you checked out the prices for something that must be prepared, oh, so carefully, or it will taste “fishy”? My steaks taste “meaty” and it’s NOT a problem, thank you very much.
And all those fish look alike to me. For instance, I’ve heard that scrod is whatever they tell you it is. Whatever they have in the kitchen is the scrod that night. Basically, if you paid more than $6 a pound, you got scrod. Daily Gut
Cut my sea critters square. Coat ‘em with beer batter and deep fry ‘em. Serve with home fries or wild rice. And Blue Moon in a tall glass (orange slice optional)…
WARNING: NO AFTERLIFE! DRIVE CAREFULLY!!
Weekend nights at our crib are never uneventful. Last night a guy at the door yelled, “Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms!” I just assumed it was someone bringing more supplies.
Tonight the Greene County Sheriff set up a DUI checkpoint in our fucking DRIVEWAY!!
Have you ever noticed that every great drinking story begins with the same word?
It begins with the letter “A”.
No, it’s not “alcohol”.
“The word is apparently”…
Apparently, the couple of beers I went out for cost $117.63.
Apparently, Scottish men don’t wear anything under their kilts.
Apparently, Scottish men don’t like it when you call their kilts “skirts.”
Apparently, Scottish men hit really hard for someone wearing a skirt with no underwear.
Apparently, he was NOT wearing a kilt on ladies night in hopes of beating the system on a technicality…
Apparently, I felt like singing because I jumped up on stage with the band.
Apparently, there is some kind of law against doing that. Modern Drunkard
Here’s a question that’ll make ya go, “Hmmmm… ”
If a watermelon is full of water, what's inside a kumquat?
HERE’S YOUR VIDEO: Who didn’t love the indefatigable TITO PUENTE?
Click this!
I-I-I
The difference between the Clinton & Bush Whitehouses - according to MSNBC’s Hardball’s Chris Mathews? The Clinton camp, he said, never put pressure on his bosses to silence him.
“Not so this crowd,” he added, explaining that Bush White House officials - especially those from Vice President Cheney's office - called MSNBC brass to complain about the content of his show and attempted to influence its editorial content. "They will not silence me!" Matthews declared.
Be careful, Chris. They (Bushco AND CBS) totally fucked Dan Rather for refusing to be muzzled. 
New Book:
Clarence Thomas Gets Caught Trying To Reinvent Anita Hill 
Jake Novak's Humor Blog
Bush Veto
President Bush has vetoed a plan to expand a children's health insurance program by $35 billion over five years. Bush said he did it because the bill was a dangerous step toward "federalizing" medicine... then he had to cut his speech short so he could get his free check-up and meds at Walter Reed Federal Hospital.
Paul Money
Relatively unknown Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul's campaign raised a surprising $5.1 million dollars in the third quarter. Paul plans on winning the GOP primaries by legally changing his name to "none of the above."
Comedian Argus Hamilton
GOP candidate Ron Paul alarmed his party with a huge third-quarter fundraising total, mostly from Internet donors. The anti-war congressman told reporters it's not a top-down campaign, the campaign is really bottom up. Well, he is a gynecologist. 
Jenna Bush has a new book! How'd she manage THAT?!
John McLame said President Bush should have urged everyone to enlist in the military after the World Trade Center attack. That's unreasonable. There was no rush to enlist until the facts were in and the president invaded the WRONG COUNTRY!! 
Christian conservatives threatened to bolt the GOP if Rudy Giuliani is the GOP nominee. Evangelicals can't stand Rudy. He's pro-gay, he's pro-choice, he's had three wives and he wore a dress on Saturday Night Live, and he doesn't seem sorry at all. 
Newt Gingrich said he won't run for president after his lawyers told him it would risk his foundation's tax-exempt status. That was close. It finally dawned on Newt that if he became president he'd have to pay taxes like the rest of us. 
PIGEON POOP
In Cincinnati, there's a plan to shoot pigeons at Paul Brown Stadium because football fans are getting splashed with pigeon
poop. Pigeon poop is to Cincinnati football what Marge Schott
was to Cincinnati baseball. Thanx t' Tom's Lake Humor Co.
Jake Novak's Humor Blog
Jake
Top 5 Lessons K-Fed Has Been Teaching the Boys
5) Gold digging for toddlers
4) How NOT to dance
3) Smokin' Playdough
2) Strip club etiquette
1) Helping daddy up
COMEDIAN ARGUS HAMILTON
Come and laugh with Argus
in San Diego!
Friday and Saturday, October 12-13
8:00 and 10:30 p.m.
The Comedy Store La Jolla
Call 858-454-9176
for information and reservations
New York Knicks coach Isiah Thomas was found liable Tuesday in a workplace sex harassment suit. He knows today's rules. When a man talks dirty to a woman it's sexual harassment and when a woman talks dirty to a man, it's three dollars a minute.
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A model wears a creation by Swedish designer Paulo Melim Andersson during his Spring-Summer 2008 ready-to-wear fashion collection for Chloe, presented in Paris, Saturday, Oct. 6, 2007.
[Photo by Jacques Brinon]
HUNKS FOR THE LADIES
Aaron McGruder
A guy enters confessional and says to the priest with guilt, "I had an affair...almost."
The priest says, "What do you mean ’almost?’"
The guy says, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed against each other, but then I stopped."
"In the eyes of the Lord, rubbing against each other is the same as sticking it in," says the priest. "For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $20 in the poor box."
The guy leaves the confessional, says his prayers, then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment then starts to leave.
The priest, seeing this, quickly runs over to him and says, "You didn’t put any money in the poor box!"
The guy stops and says, "Yeah, but I rubbed the $20 on the box, and in the eyes of the Lord, that’s the same as sticking it in."
I dreamed that I talked to God. He said he doesn’t do that - but he’d make an exception for an atheist…
He said, Humans’ve got multiplying down. Now let's try replenishing for a while.
I don't care who started it. Just stop it.
If you seek to know my ways, read a damn science book.
Six days? Yeah, right. I'm a scientist, not a magician.
If I wanted humans to have seven kids, I would have given you a bigger planet.
He claims Bush talks to him - but he doesn’t listen. Like when God told him, “You're not tracking those bloody footprints in here.”
Excuse me? Where do you see my name on the front of the Bible?
Only six thousand years old? Oh, that's a good one. 
BOOTILICIOUS BEYONCE
MORE - I dreamed I talked to God again...
Just look at this planet! Do you expect me to clean this up?
Here's a clue—if they say they're doing it in my name, they're lying.
I gave you a bigger brain for a reason. Start using it.
Want to know how old the earth is? Ask the earth, not the Bible.
I like to kick things off with a bang. A Big Bang.
If you didn't hear it straight from my lips, take it with a grain of salt.
There is no such thing as killing in my name.
Stop smirking, America. I'm talking to you, too. 
The not necessarily well-prepared student sat in his life science classroom staring at a question on the final exam paper. The question directed: "Give four advantages of breast milk." What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:
1. No need to boil.
2. Cats can't steal it.
3. Available whenever necessary.
So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a four-part answer. Again, what to write? Once more, he sighed. He frowned. He scowled, then sighed again. But suddenly, he brightened. He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly, he scribbled his definitive answer:
4. Available in attractive containers.'
A POLICEMAN heard this plea on his radio: "Does anyone know where I'm at? I'm all screwed up."
It was a patrolman who had lost his way. Another voice rang out, bold and authoritative: "Would the officer making that last transmission please identify himself?"
After a short silence, a third unidentified voice said, "He's not that screwed Up.
(If Dr Melfi were a brook trout - I’d bone her…)
FIRST National Bank of Washington Ill., tried to encourage business through billboard advertising, but conveyed quite a different message when the following ad was displayed: "Loans make life easier, at FIRST."
Good fortune. COMMENT! Please spread the meme. Don’t smoke in bed…
