October 13 , 2ôô7
Speaking on the anniversary of the first Sputnik flight, Hillary spoke of the value of science and discovery. "I believe in evolution," she told The New York Times in an interview. "One of our gifts from God is the ability to reason. I am grateful that I have the ability to look at dinosaur bones and draw my own conclusions."
Hillary’s Plan: Ending the War On Science 
Hillary Clinton’s Economic Blueprint for the 21st Century: Rebuilding the Road to the Middle Class
The American Federation Of Teachers (AFT) joins a growing group of national unions that have endorsed Hillary's campaign, including:
International Union of Bricklayers and Allied Craftworkers
National Association of Letter Carriers
International Association of Machinists and Aerospace workers
United Transportation Union
Retail, Wholesale, Department Store Union
Hillary Clinton dropped her idea of a five thousand dollar bond for every baby in America Tuesday. She announced a plan to give every American a thousand dollars a year in retirement funds. She would give away cars but Oprah's already endorsed Obama.
Just kidding, Hillary!
CELEBRATE COLUMBUS’ DISCOVERY OF THE AMERICAS!
Columbus may or may not have been a heroic figure. On Columbus Day…we celebrate Western civilization as history’s greatest cultural achievement. What better reason could there be for a holiday? READ
P.S.: The Cleveland Indians beat the Yankees on Monday. It took five hundred and fifteen years but the Indians finally caught a break on Columbus Day!
RANT, REV, RANT!!
DA REV IS KINDA FONDA WANDA!
Madonna has been nominated for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Fine. I’m happy for her. But Wanda Jackson, The Queen of Rockabilly, one of the first bonafide solo female rock stars - is still waiting for the call, despite thousands of fan protests to the Hall (including Elvis Costello)!
Please send your letters submitting her name to:
Joel Peresman
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Foundation
1290 Avenue of the Americas
2nd Floor
New York City, NY 101044
CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE “PARTY” BY WANDA JACKSON
30 High-Powered Rockers! And Help Support This Blog…
Nappy Brown is the stage name of Napoleon Brown Culp (78). Brown is a gospel-influenced blues singer, whose hits include the 1955 Billboard Chart No 2, Don't Be Angry. Among several follow-up hits is “Pitter Patter”. His style is readily recognizable; Brown uses a wide vibrato, stutters, melisma and a distinctive "li-li-li-li-li". (Wikipedia)
He wrote “Night Time is the Right Time”, a seminal hit for Ray Charles. He is a member of The Blues Hall of Fame. Nappy brown has just released a new CD on Blind Pig Records and plans to tour in support of the product.
Dawn Roma French (50) is a BAFTA Award-nominated a British comedian and actress best known for starring in her comedy sketch show French & Saunders along with her comedy partner Jennifer Saunders, and for playing the lead role in The Vicar of Dibley as Geraldine Granger. (Wikipedia)
Gen. Soe Win (59) Myanmar prime minister reviled for his role in a bloody attack on Myanmar opposition leader Aung San Suu Kyi and her followers in 2003. The fourth-ranking member of the military junta, Soe Win was nicknamed "the Butcher of Depayin" for his role in the 2003 attack on Suu Kyi and her followers in that northern town. Soe Win was said to have been suffering from leukemia. Largely considered a figurehead, his death in Yangon, Myanmar (formerly Rangoon, Burma) on October 12, 2007 was unlikely to cause a change in the regime's grip on power. Life In Legacy
RECOVERING...
Senator Ted Kennedy 'Eating Ice Cream' After Surgery On Artery 
"The politics is coming around the corner here in 2008. I'm thinking of a song like, 'The politics'll be comin' 'round the mountain when it comes ...heh heh...'" [Deranged Idiot-Boy POTUS]
Re: Mitch McConnell is all but outed as another gay-bashing closeted gay Repug leader.
“I'm not familiar with Graeme Frost - is he Mitch the Bitch's gay lover?” [BartCop.com]
“Cheney is a militant who avoided any service of his own in the military and he (thinks) that the United States has a right to inject its power through military means in other parts of the world. You know he's been a disaster for our country. I think he's been overly persuasive on Bush and quite often he's prevailed." [President Jimmy Carter]
“From a catastrophically flawed, unrealistically optimistic war plan, to the administration’s latest surge strategy, this administration has failed to employ and synchronize the political, economic and military power…” [General Rick Sanchez, former top military commander in Iraquagmire]
“All day long the news channels have been running a clip of Ann Coulter telling Donny Deutsch she wishes Jews would convert to Christianity to "become perfected," which amused me vaguely now that I'm pretty sure what she does qualifies as "performance art," until I saw the nine thousandth pundit come on and decry her "anti-Semitism" and finally felt compelled to point out what is really very obvious to anyone with experience as a self-hating Gentile: Ann Coulter seriously has a massive hard-on for the Jews.” Jezebel Magazine
“Like so many of those kids wearing tees with faces of James Dean or The Ramones, most of the under 40 crowd sporting the bearded one's likeness haven't a clue about Che Guevara or his penchant for Stalinist tactics. He was fortunate to have posed for a flattering snapshot (perhaps the only one) at some time in his life, which was fortuitously cut short.
We’ll never know what might have been. My guess is Castro would have had him dispatched a la that other rock star revolutionary, Trotsky, perhaps, also, with an ice pick through the head…” [Rev. Art]
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WELL HOWDY, REV’LERS!
I’m Rev. Art. Welcome to our crib in Metro Fairborn and THE STAND-UP! - Its like "The View" - without the retarded black girl...
Women in Metro Fairborn, Ohio are the most sexually active women in America according to a new national sex survey. It's bad for the local economy. The Central Avenue Hooker, who works out of her ‘91 tan Subaru, says slutty behavior by Fairborn women has killed her once-thriving business. 
PLEASE - join Da Rev & Da Pagan Baby in contributing to an all out effort to eradicate a horrific malady brought to our attention by Alex and Harvey. I hope we can count on a check from everyone here this weekend for $500. or more for continuing research into “Dog's Grotto Eyes”…
When you hit the buffet, be sure to sample the Calamares al tequila (grilled squid with Spanish paprika, olive oil, sherry vinegar and a drop of tequila). Personally I’m downloadin’ the “Pigs in a Blanket” (with blueberries). 
Hold the catsup! They’re servin’ gourmet hot dogs on the buffet. The dogs are brushed with a Dijon mustard-Hollandaise glaze, on a toasted pumpernickel bun infused with saffron and coriander, covered with caramelized onions, crusted mango slices, chopped artichoke hearts al dente - and served on a clean paper plate.
You say you’re a vegetarian? That’s SO 1990s. The latest trend is toward flexitarians. They eat mostly veggies, fruits and grains, but occasionally they eat meat. Then there are "Bragatarians". Bragatarians are always bragging about how they eat a healthier diet than you eat. 
A word to the wise - whoever’s been leavin’ those little Jesus cards on the tables here - when I find out who it is - they’re gonna be curb-stomped and eaten - like that pickpocket we caught back in June. Remember? Don’t make Da Rev and Macho the Dog get all Neanderthal-ugly on yer asses!
Did you see this? In Richmond, Virginia, someone found a brain in a bag on the street. That's right, a brain. They think it may be the brain of someone born in the first half of the 20th Century - it has a bunch of vacuum tubes and a fan-belt. Tom's Lake Humor Co.
(CLICK THIS!)
Big news in the world of beer. Coors and Miller are merging. Their first product will be a blend of Coors Light and Miller Lite targeting the bottled water market. Tom's Lake Humor Co.
TOBIN SPROUT - formerly of Guided By Voices (GBV) - is a very successful artist.
Jack, our bartender, has created the perfect diet cocktail. Seriously, he’s the proud inventor of the "Slim Jim": that’s Ultra Slim-Fast and Jim Beam. 
KIEFER'S HEADED TO JAIL FOR A REPEAT DUI; he has to surrender all his kids to Kevin...
Jerry says he’s just nuts about his wife - deeply in love. When they go to bed, he thinks he hears bells - as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
I see where Mitt Romney’s aides are urging him to discuss his Mormon faith in order to clear up any public misperceptions. Good idea. I mean, don’t Mormons believe that the Garden of Eden was in St. Louis?!
The New York Times says here that the White House secretly endorsed the torture of suspects while publicly denying it. Techniques include immersion, head-slapping and sticking their heads into buckets of ice. HOLD ON!! That’s how I prepared for class most mornings 40 some years ago at University of Dayton! 
For the remaining months of the current administration - I think the White House should install a sign to read "Whores in back," with the tagline "that's how we stay in business." 
Boy, that Man Coulter is all over the TV these days - speaking of whores. Her face, to me, is a perfect oval, like a circle that’s had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master - or Rosie O’Donnell’s whompin’ thighs.
Ms. Coltface stands by her opinion that women should never have gotten the vote, ‘cuz so many of them vote for Democrats. Ladies, take warning - misogynist males have always tried to hold your gender back. Don’t let the blonde mane and the skimpy skirts fool you. CHEESES! If Coulter’s skirts were any shorter his noogs would be hangin’ out!
HERE’S YOUR VIDEO! 40 + years ago a young man left Fairview High School and Dayton, Ohio to seek his own truth. After many years wandering in the desert, my friend Rod has come in to share his vision @ YouTube. Rev’lers, here’s Pope Rod: 
Da Rev’s Wisdom: Precisely the least, the softest, lightest, a lizard's rustling, a breath, a flash, a moment - a little makes the way of the best happiness.
I-I-I
Wing Nuts mostly have their panties all in a wad over Jimmy Carter’s remarks about Bush and Cheney this week. They say there’s an unwritten rule: “Former presidents don’t diss current ones.“ Duh! Well, their hero Reagan didn’t do that. Please keep in mind that when Mr. Reagan left office his synapses were already seriously kaput.
SERIOUS TRIVIA here: First Woman to run for Prez? First Black to run for Prez? Nope. Unh-uh. Sorry. Shirley Chisholm (1972) was, in fact, a woman and she was black. Not her. In 1872, women's suffrage advocate Victoria Woodhull and abolitionist Frederick Douglass, representing the Equal Rights Party, were running mates for the presidency! (U.S. Grant, a straight white male progressive Republican, won a second term.)
Jake Novak's Humor Blog
Nobel Gore
Al Gore won this year's Nobel Peace Prize, mostly for his environmental work, but also because he finally got his son off the streets.
Israeli Peace Plan
In a concilliatory gesture, the Israeli government is offering to hand over certain parts of Jerusalem to Palestinian control. The Palestinians plan to use that new land as a place to bury all the Israelis they're going to kill.
Comedian Argus Hamilton
Great Britain said it will pull troops from Southern Iraq. Everybody is afraid that civil war and ethnic strife will erupt and leave the country forever ungovernable if the British leave. What happened after Yorktown could happen in Iraq! 
Senator John McLame told a Detroit crowd Tuesday that he would completely retool the country's unemployment system and focus on older workers. Everyone's in favor of retooling older workers. I could use a full face and neck lift. 
Senator Larry Craig was inducted into Idaho's Hall of Fame. He should stop apologizing. If strangers didn't meet for anonymous sex and then disappear from each other's lives forever, many of our nation's lawmakers would never have been born.
President Bush vetoed the bill to expand health insurance for children last week. The idea runs counter to his party's free market philosophy. Republicans believe that children should be insured by their employers, the way the Chinese do it. 
Fred Thompson appeared in his first GOP debate Tuesday in Detroit. His advisors worry he's an uninformed bonehead who knows nothing about foreign policy. Surely the Republicans do not think a candidate like that could get elected president - not again. 
President Bush was interviewed on Arab television, where he announced the U.S. has no plans to attack Iran. What? If we had wanted a war with no plans we could have kept Don Rumsfeld. 
GOP candidate Tom Tancredo, running in the 1908 Republican primary, blasted an Iowa judge for upholding same-sex marriage. Gays are a big constituency in Iowa. Hold a casting call in Des Moines and you will be amazed how many Iowans can dance that Shipoopi number from The Music Man. 
Log Cabin Republicans said this week they'll oppose Mitt Romney. They are a group of gay Republicans founded upon the evidence that Abe Lincoln was secretly gay. Do you know how hard you had to tap your foot so the guy could hear you in the next outhouse? 
MORE Argus
Rudy Giuliani was booed by Yankees fans at Yankee Stadium Monday when he was shown on the giant video screen during the team's season-ending loss to Cleveland. Of course he was there. When a New York landmark collapses, you just can't keep him away.
Olympic superstar Marion Jones wept Friday as she admitted lying about steroid use. She's a great performer. Last year Marion Jones gave the most emphatic denial in the doping scandal since Sammy Sosa told Congress that he did not take any stereos. 
Barry Bonds' former mistress Kimberly Bell is featured in Playboy this month. She said he threatened to cut off her head and leave her in a ditch. He can only get away with it if he commits the crime in Los Angeles or goes to work for Blackwater Security.
Tom's Lake Humor Co.
OZZIE
Ozzie Osbourne is doing some housecleaning - he'll auction items from his three homes. When reached for comment Ozzie said:
"WOT?!? I oon three fooking ‘omes?" 
Along with personal items, Ozzie is selling some of his rock band memorabilia. When asked about this -- Ozzie said: "WOT?!? I played in a fooking band??"
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I love Carla Gugino's wide stance...
HUNKS FOR THE LADIES
Rockster Hunkster Lenny Kravitz
A guy walks into a bar …OUCH!!… He says to the bartender, "I'll bet you 50 dollars I can bite my eye."
So the bartender, wanting to see this anyway, lays down 50 dollars. The guy takes out his glass eye and bites it. He then says, "OK, I'll give you another chance, I'll bet you 50 dollars I can bite my other eye." So the bartender thinks, he can't have two glass eyes, and lays 50 more down on the bar.
The guy then takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. The bartender is upset, so the guy says, "OK, I'll bet you double or nothing you can slide a shot glass the length of the bar and I can run along side and pee in it without spilling a drop."
The bartender thinks, I have to see this...so he slides a shot glass the length of the bar and the guy misses completely and pisses all over the bar!
The bartender is so happy he won, he proceeds to jump up and down cheering. Just then, a guy at the back of the bar stands up and curses and kicks the bar stool.
As the guy is paying the bartender, the bartender asks, "Gee, wonder what's his problem?"
"Oh him? I bet him a thousand dollars I could piss all over the bar and make the bartender happy about it!" 
Blender Mag says Charlize Theron is the hottest woman in Hollywood!
She is so DAMN hot - if beauty were a margarita, I'd lick the salt off her rim.
An Irish guy walks into a bar… HE DUCKS!… The bartender looks him up and down and says, "Hey, Mick - ye’s got a steerin’ wheel on your pecker."
The Irishman replies, "Ay, it's driving me nuts!" 
There's this guy sitting at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half an hour. Then this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and drinks it all down.
The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says: "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man crying."
"No, it's not that. This is the worst day of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I'm late to my office. My boss, outraged, fires me. When I leave the building, to go to my car, I find out it was stolen. The police say they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there but the cab had already driven away. I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home and come to this bar. And when I'm thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison . . ."
If attitude were San Francisco I'd spend a warm Summer evening riding Sorayama's trolley - with all my friends.
SIGNS THAT YOU MAY BE DRINKIN’ TOO MUCH
* You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
* Your job is interfering with your drinking.
* The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
* You can focus better with one eye closed.
* The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
* Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as dinner; screw dinner!
* Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
* Man Coulter looks good to you.
If Kathy West were a game of Hide & Seek and I were “It” - I would come without counting from one to ten!
MORE SIGNS THAT YOU MAY BE DRINKIN’ TOO MUCH
* You wake up screaming, "TORO TORO TORO!", in the middle of the night.
* Two hands and just one mouth...now THAT'S a drinking problem!
* You spent Sunday night in jail for cow-tipping - with your Oldsmobile.
* Your name is Otis and Sheriff Andy has brought you some of Aunt Bea's pancakes.
* For the money you spent on Thunderbird, you could've bought the car.
* Yet again, your Chinese dry cleaner greets you with, "How are you today, Mr. Vomit Man!"
* Too often, you sound like you're speaking a different language and get irritated when others don't understand you.
Y' say Studebakers don't LOOK Jewish?!
Good fortune. COMMENT! Please spread the meme. Don’t smoke in bed…
